“Charles is so articulate.”

Never did I think I would be described as being articulate, yet someone at Sunday School described me as such during a discussion involving C.S. Lewis’ Screwtape Letters. I was flattered by the compliment; however, I know it was a long journey to get to where I am now. I’ve been meaning to write about this journey and - with my Independent Study students giving a presentation later this week - figured I would write this now and tie it in with presentations and public speaking.


I remember the first time I became aware I talked differently than other people. I was in 8th grade, hanging out in the orchestra room, when one of my friends commented on my lisp. I had never heard of a lisp before, but my friend described it as slurring my s. I became hyper-aware of my speech “defect”, shying away from speaking out loud and sharing.

I tried making it cool to myself - I would joke around and think ‘Wow I can speak Parseltongue!” - but let’s be real, I couldn’t. It helped when I got braces in late 9th grade, because then it was the braces causing the speech impediment, and I got by until senior year of high school when I got my braces off. Entering senior year, I was still shy and hesitant, concerned about seeming weird and other things the typical high schooler is worried about. This is a story for another time, but essentially I broke out of my shell for the first time my senior year on a bus ride back from an orchestra concert in Austin and I became much more outgoing. January 2012. People even came up to me and told me about the difference they saw, all thanks to a Truth or Dare game and yelling “I need to poop!” while running to the restroom on the back of a charter bus.

Oh, I forgot to mention I ran for NHS President and Orchestra President at the end of my junior year. Suffice to say, I didn’t win any of the positions - they went to the better candidates honestly. Parodying Taylor Swift’s “You Belong With Me” and running on a platform of cookies definitely did not help.


My next memory of being acutely aware of speaking in front of others was the summer after my sophomore year of college, when I traveled to Southeast Asia and was asked to give a message to a local church. I don’t remember the preparation for the message; all I remember was standing up there and thinking everyone in my audience was ‘against’ me and it was my job to win them over and convince them of my correctness. Of course that’s not how it actually was - they were rooting for me and wanted to hear what I had to say - but that was my mindset at the time. It was my first time speaking to such a large group of people since graduating high school.

I lost progress my junior year. I was a central leader of my campus Christian group and I was in charge of leading some small group leaders. Every week, Stacey (my co-leader) and I would gather everyone together to lead an activity/briefing. That was a great way to gain experience in speaking in front of others, but week-by-week it didn’t necessarily become easier.

One memory that stands out to me my junior year is when I was driving some people home. One of the people I was driving was the younger sister of someone I met in college as well. I don’t remember the exact words she said, but essentially she told me her older brother had complimented me but said I would be taken so much more seriously and be cooler if I didn’t have my lisp. I laughed it off then and there but I would be lying if I said it didn’t have any effect on me. It took root deep in my mind and every conversation was colored with that thought in the background. That year, I was also asked to share about my time in Southeast Asia at a large conference. I was so nervous. The night before, I stayed up until 5:00AM planning and preparing for my 3 minute sharing time. Afterwards, a lot of people congratulated me and said I did a great job. Inwardly, I could only think about how much time I spent and what a waste it was to do such a ‘great’ job.

I’m not sure what transpired between my junior and senior year. Maybe it was being a 6th grade math teacher for Breakthrough Austin and getting some great teaching experience. Maybe it was just time and maturity. Maybe love, friends, or some other things - my new position as the admin for my campus ministry club? Regardless, I was once again asked to share in front of a large conference, the 2016-2017 Cru Winter Conference Red River Region. However, this time I did not stay up all night preparing and planning and fretting. Rather, I prepped a bit, practiced a little, and went to sleep at a reasonable hour. And you know what? My sharing went fine. In my mind though, I felt super great - better than I had ever felt about public speaking. I realized that some chains of my past were finally gone.


I’ve grown even more since then in my public speaking ability. It might have to do with me having to speak to over 150 students every day and getting to know another batch every year. Maybe it’s more maturity, more experience, more self-confidence. Maybe it’s feeling like I am given the room to speak and people are interested in what I have to say. Maybe it’s… a lot of things.

For some strange reason, I ended up teaching Video Game Design. And I’ve got to say - teaching Video Game Design, getting into Table Top Games - all of it has really helped improve my speaking and explanation-giving ability. Or maybe it’s just my years of teaching and having to explain even the most ‘obvious’ things to some students.

I also think it’s a mental thing. There was a time before where I would consider my audience as antagonistic to me. Now? They are listening to me - so they at least have some interest in what I am sharing. I have also learned to accept my lisp and slightest of stutters. I’ve gained practice in stopping, taking a breath, and speaking a bit slower to help.

Anyways, it’s funny how this post was inspired by a random Sunday School comment made by someone about how articulate they perceived me to be. It’s been a long journey, and I’m still growing in speaking publicly.

(I started writing this earlier in October but didn’t finish until November. Whoops. I decided to put the initial day as the article date.)